...squirt the fucker in the eye with them. That'll teach the bitch-ass to fuck with me.
Gentle reader you may have noticed that as of late my entries have had a rather shall we say violent tone to them. That's because I have a particular hate-on for life right now. Yes, me and Life have a love-hate relationship. I hate It because It loves to fuck me in the ass on a regular basis.
As a heterosexual male my rectum is EXIT ONLY. Yet I seem to take it in the sphincter on an alarmingly regular basis. The really sad part is that many times I can see it coming and yet I feel powerless to do anything about it. As Cory so succinctly put it "Grab your ankles and bite this stick, we'll be with you in a moment" seems to be a common theme of my life.
I've been in some deep, dark holes in my life (Cory wipe that fucking smirk off of your face) and while the psuedo-optimists would likely see it as some sort of purgatory I prefer to call it what it is, Hell.
I'm a single male (not by choice, single that is (Cory that's two strikes you motherfucker)), broke and stuck in a job that I detest. Now I'm aware that I'm not unique to these particular set of circumstances but that changes things not one fucking iota. The fact is it sucks the sweat off of a dead camels balls.
I wish I were independently wealthy (I'm not) or hooked up with a sugar momma (I will be accepting applications) or I wish I could find a way to just be happy.
Now we all know that isn't gonna happen anytime soon so don't you fucking worry your pretty little head I'm sure life still has plenty of curve balls left to throw me (I warned you Cory, that's three you fuckwad).
So in the meantime, sit back and enjoy the show.
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